How To Teach Your Children About Black History

As my daughter Shyla said, “Black history should not be a month, it should be every day, just like we learn about everything else.” What a great point!  But since Black history is unfortunately overlooked in the standard US history classes, a dedicated month is needed and so valuable to truly learn about US history.

I have friends of various races, ethnic backgrounds, and faiths, and hence my girls know that some of their friends are Jewish, some are Christian, some are from South America, some are from Europe, some are from Jamaica, some are Black, some are Egyptian, some are Indian, etc. And many friends ask me how I talk to my children about race, because it can make some parents uncomfortable.

I get it- it may not feel right commenting on someone’s race.  However, not commenting on race also is not the approach and can lead to ignorance and misconceptions. I always look at this way- I want my kids to learn about everything from me first.  They learned how to read from me, they learned the basic concepts of math from me, they learn about other races from me, etc.  While educators are amazing and teach our kids so much, we need to recognize that certain teachings must come from the home, come from us as parents.

So, why start these discussions now?  While children at young ages have started to be conditioned to racial bias, they are also especially capable of reprogramming and overcoming those biases.  Sad to say that a lot of those biases start at home and hence can be stopped at home. Black parents and other people of color do not have the luxury of not talking about racism, because their children are likely to experience it every day. We should all be talking to our children about racism.

While there are many approaches to teaching your children about Black History, an important focus of those teachings is how to be anti-racist. A few notes:  First, this is not something I am doing just this month for Black History Month, this is an ongoing discussion.  Second, as my family is Indian-American, my children also experience racism. They understand what it feels like to be people of color, how to be proud of who you are, and be an ally to others. However, I still feel strongly about teaching them about the lived experiences of Black Americans in this country, which is different from our family’s experience. This may seem obvious, but I know many minority families who do not educate their children on the experiences of other minorities in America.

That said, here is how I approach Black History Month with my 5 and 4 year old daughters, through a lens of “seeing everyone’s color” (look out for a blog post on this topic soon).  

1. Introduce Black History Month, but don’t leave out why it exists. First, I share with my girls that February is a month in which we celebrate the contributions and accomplishments of Black people in our country. I make sure to tell them that Black people are not treated the same as white people in this country. This is something my daughters can relate to being people of color.  In addition, I share that we do not learn enough about Black History in school, so there's this special month to celebrate their work. I emphasize that this is not enough, and that we should discuss Black history as we do US History- all year long. 

2. Introduce terms that children will hear in the world. Don't make these words taboo, and don't shy away from discussions that come from sharing them. It can be confusing when kids hear a lot of words they don’t understand, and that’s true for adults too.  With antiracist work, it’s especially important to discuss terminology. When kids do not understand words, they may ask you OR they may ignore the word. You don’t want them to ignore the word, rather discuss them in a way they can comprehend.  This glossary of antiracist terminology (LIINK) is extremely helpful in knowing the appropriate terminology to use and the best ways to discuss racism. Some of the terms I have chosen to discuss are: 

• Racism
• Bias
• Privilege
• Diversity
• Equality 
• Segregation
• Black Lives Matter - This movement started years ago but became prominent in 2020 when people used unjustified force and innocent Black people died. My girls are familiar with the Black Lives Matter movement, because we attended a peaceful march last June. Recently they found our signs and it sparked a conversation naturally, giving me the opportunity to talk to them about it again. They shared that someone told them that Black Lives Matter is "over." I explained that it is absolutely not over, and that Black Lives will always matter and that we have so much more work to do to ensure that their voices are heard and their lives are protected.

3. Introduce important Black historical figures. (see Shyla’s video) A great factual way to discuss the words from the list above is to introduce one famous Black historical figure at a time and teach your children about that person's achievements. This enables you to explain the words in that context and then bring the word to life today.  Stick to the historical facts of the past and how that translates to present times.

4. Be authentic and bring real examples to life. (see image from Nelson Mandela museum in South Africa) While you need to be intentional, you also need to be authentic in your discussions.  Talking about the achievements of Black Americans cannot happen without talking about racism, and the subject generally makes even adults feel uncomfortable and hence the discussions also become uncomfortable.  We want to teach our children to feel comfortable having these discussions.  Hence, discuss these words in a way that your children will understand (e.g. racism, imagine if you were not allowed to play in a park because of your color.  Well- that was the life of Black children and they still go through this today in neighborhoods.)  In this way, children can connect with how others are treated and will feel, hence helping them gain an understanding and empathy towards others.

5. Diversify your bookshelf: Make sure your books have main characters who are Black. Here are a few great children’s books I like for the preschool/early elementary years that feature Black main characters and link to Black history and current events.

Thanks for reading through all this.  As I always say, “Even a sprinkle of knowledge can open up a world of curiosity.”  As parents, let’s share more about Black History and leverage this month (and every other month) to teach our children about the world and all its people.

For additional resources, please visit Racial Equity Tools.